A Rough Day, and Then the Evening Sky

I just finished washing my clothes. Everything I needed to do today is finally done.

The past few days have been so busy that I have not made it to the library. Damn, I did not even get around to a podcast during the day. Now there is finally time to listen for a bit and sit down to write.

I started with the episode of Zhixing Tavern featuring Ye Tan, “I Am No Longer Just Passing Through Life”.

Before We Blame Someone

A little background: Ye Tan is a financial commentator and columnist with a doctorate in history from Fudan University. She has written extensively about capital markets and property. After a serious illness, she joined this conversation with her new book, Making Peace with Life, looking back at her years of relentless work and discussing how she now sees other people and everyday life. The episode notes provide this background.

As I listened to their discussion of life and death, one thought stayed with me: we should be slow to blame people for the choices they make when their lives are at stake.

From the outside, it is so easy to say, “If it were me, I would definitely do this.” We do not have to endure that person's pain, face what they are afraid of losing, or go on living their life after the decision. Yet sometimes we know only the outcome and already feel ready to judge whether they were rational or brave enough.

Putting ourselves in someone else's shoes may take more than imagining what we would do. It also means admitting that we might not be able to imagine it properly. How much exhaustion, attachment, and private difficulty sits inside a situation that an observer never gets to see?

I do not think understanding means agreeing with every decision. But before asking, “How could you do that?”, could we first ask what options the person actually had, and what they most feared losing? Someone may already be struggling to get through the day. We do not also need to demand that they make the experience look dignified and strong, fitting our own idea of courage.

That is my own takeaway from tonight's listening. The next time I cannot immediately understand someone's choice, I hope I can hold back the blame and listen a little longer.

I also caught up on an episode of Shengdong Espresso: the one about footwear brands embracing ballet-inspired designs. It included news of layoffs at Uber. In its September 2 company announcement, Uber confirmed plans to reduce its workforce by about 10%, citing fewer management layers and simpler team structures.

Enough of what was happening in my headphones. Let me tell you about the rather sorry state of my own day.

A Rough Day, and Then the Evening Sky

I got sunburned during military training, then got knocked flying while playing football. There are a few scrapes near the corner of my eye too.

I also got a new pair of glasses today. I actually think they look pretty good, though. It was not all bad.

If I stopped there, the day would sound fairly miserable. But the evening sky above the football field really did lift a lot of that gloom.

The sky was still blue, with clouds spreading across it and a little pale gold along their edges. The lights below the trees were already on, and people were still out on the field. A sky like that simply makes me feel a little better. I do not have a grand explanation for it.

The sunburn and scrapes were still there. But I no longer wanted “bad luck” to be the only thing I remembered about today.

I am putting yesterday's freshman welcome meeting here too. Among all the writing on the blackboard were a few large characters: “Welcome, new students.” Training, welcome meetings, and everyday chores have all been crowding into these days. Everything feels a little rushed. I still want to keep a few photographs, so that “I was busy” is not all I remember later.

And we received a notice about some time off today. At least there is something else to look forward to.

The library is still on my mind, and there is more I want to listen to. But tonight the laundry is done, the day's tasks are finished, and this entry has reached its end. I am not adding another task after it.

Anyway, good night, friends.

Sleep well. Don't miss me too much.